Thursday, May 13, 2010

Little Things

I have a friend who is going through a very rough time.
Relationships are ending as babies are being born and it is entirely overwhelming for her. We have an understanding right now. When she calls, I answer.

In fact, one day I was on the phone with my friend in D.C. when this friend called. I let it go to voicemail. Then my land line rang and I let it go to voicemail too. Seconds later my cell rang again. I looked at my phone to see that it was this special friend and told my D.C. friend, "____ just rang for third time in a row. I need to see what it is. I'll call you back."

Next thing I knew, I was on my way to her house while I called my D.C. friend back saying, "If you tell a mother of two children under 20 months to call you if she needs anything... she will!"

I happily do what I can to help her. Incidentally, I am also Godmother to both of her children.
Sometimes I think that God arranged for me to be unemployed right now so that I can be available to help her through the toughest time of her life.

A couple weeks ago she confided in me that she felt broken. My heart ached for her.
I thought to send her an uplifting card for mother's day, considering her kids are too small to acknowledge the day. Then I thought it would be nice to get her other friends to do the same.
A mass email went out.
One friend offered to start a meal delivery schedule.
It was beautiful!

Today she called to thank me for that. She told me that the meals are much appreciated as she just can't make it grocery store more than once every 2 -3 weeks.

Then I felt shame. In fact the last time I was at the store I thought about her, thought about calling her... and did nothing.

"Okay sister, the next time I'm at the grocery store, I'm calling you. You need to tell people that!"

Because how hard is it to pick up a few more things and swing by her house? I know she'll write a check for me on the spot. It's a small favor.

I'm sharing this just as a small reminder to think about what the people in your life need.
Do you know an overwhelmed mom who could use a bag of groceries delivered to her house? How about an elderly, widowed man or woman who could use a ride to the grocery store and an hour's company?

It might seem like we can't fit these little favors in ... but we can. A quick call, "I'm heading to the store. Do you need anything or can I pick you up on the way?"

They may not even take you up on it - but just being asked lets them know they are thought of and cared for.

In fact, I'd like to make this some sort of a fixture in my church community. We don't do well enough to serve people around here.
It only takes a spark.


Genevra said...

I loved this post. It is so true that sometimes the gestures that mean the most to people, are the smallest ones that we don't think much about, or wouldn't be that hard for us to make. Thank you for reminding me of that.

The suggestion about an elderly person, struck a soft spot in my heart. It reminded me of my grandparents and how much just spending a little bit of time or a brief phone call would make their day. Now that they have both passed, I really cherish even more the time I spent with them.

J said...

When my friend had her second baby she was overwhelmed and had trouble figuring out how to get to the grocery store with 2 babies, so I did the same thing.

One other thing I did is that in the days before I went to the store (I go on Tuesdays) I would text her every day and ask to just randomly send me the names of items she is out of. So, she would text me things like "organic vitamin D milk" at random times. Then when I went to the store I pulled up her texts and got all the things. I think that was easier for her than having to sit down and make out a list and covered all those things you forget you need! Hope that might help!

Ronnica said...

I think that this is a hard thing to put in practice...but needed. I'm so self-absorbed, living in my own little world. I'm not naturally observant, but that's definitely magnified by my own self-centeredness. Thanks for the reminder.

girl from florida said...

You are AMAZING. You always inspire me! Thank you.

Anonymous said...

This really was such an inspirational post. Sincere kindness is beautiful!