Tuesday, September 28, 2010

Pressure Cooker

Turns out it does upset me.
Waiting so long between calls and visits that is.

My patience was wearing thin with just one phone call from McTwitchy while he was away this last time. Then when his flight was changed and he came back into town a day later and didn't contact me for almost an entire week - I was hurt and livid.

I'm prepared to write him off. This relationship is over.

I was ashamed of myself for calling and leaving a voicemail asking what was going on... referring to an email from him that seemed more appropriate for his Aunt Betty, than for a woman he's supposed to be dating. Seriously kicking myself. That wasn't cool.

When we finally talked, what he revealed - redeemed him in my eyes. And it turns out, leaving that voicemail was exactly what I needed to do. Totally the right thing.

See, I've been waiting with as much anticipation as he... to learn what the company behind his Big City Freelance Job was going to offer him. Now he had the answer, but wasn't sure how or what to tell me - so he simply kept putting it off. (his words)

Bottom line, he has a very good offer to work in the The Big City and a month to decide.

Talk about a pressure cooker! This isn't just about a job offer. This means shutting down the business he started and has run for the past 15 years. This means deciding between two very different lifestyles - Denver or the Very Big City. And finally, it does have something to do with me.

Already redeemed by having told me that he didn't know how to approach the subject with me... he told me he still wants to date me - with the risk of being the guy who strings me along just to move to The Very Big City.
I say, we owe it to ourselves to see what we really have here.

Here are the factors: We haven't been dating very long. We have not seen each other much in the time we have been dating. We are both over 40, which means 1) a level of maturity in knowing what we want 2) there's no sense ending something with potential even if we have half of this continent between us. But then again, it also means 3) I can't waste more time with something that isn't going to go anywhere.

Pressure Cooker.

Friday, September 10, 2010


Homemade pizza with spinach, peppers, artichoke, olives and white sauce.
Pork loin medallions with rice, pineapple and green peppers.
Then pork chops with a fresh squash and zucchini pasta.

These are the dinners I have made for McTwitchy on the rare occasions he is back home from his Big City Freelance Job. I don't even care if he's lying when he makes delighted eating noises and says, "This is fantastic hon." or even "Don't take this the wrong way, but you can cook for me any time!"

He likes my cooking. I like my cooking.

All my friends tease me because I never cook - but it's just because I don't care for the work. Or waiting to eat for that matter.
I hate the idea of waiting 45 minutes to an hour for food to cook when I'm hungry NOW! Therefore I typically eat way too much frozen food.

In making these meals I've found myself thinking... This isn't hard. Why don't I cook more often? McTwitchy understands me so well, because he thinks the same way. He told me he understands why... because cooking just dirties dishes. It's not as satisfying to go through the trouble for just yourself.

But cooking and sharing these meals with him has been great. Because he is there to eat at least one portion... I still have the advantage of leftovers - but not the disadvantage of having to eat the same thing four days in a row! (I hate that!)

My friend's husband says this is the 'Bait and Switch' segment of courtship! I laughed, but defended myself saying, "I've always said I would cook if I had someone to cook for. And if I didn't have to do dishes. Right now I have that!"

McTwitchy is both. Someone to cook for - and the one who does dishes, cheerfully! If that continues to be our deal... I cook, he washes... I don't see a problem getting tired of that.