Thursday, August 12, 2010

What I Don't Want to Be

I have seen a potential future... and it has scared me.

or scarred me. Yikes.

I admit that I don't get out enough. Another under-employed friend of mine suffers the same problem. It's hard to go out because you know you'll buy a drink, or even just a soda, maybe an appetizer - all at an inflated price - so it's easier to just stay home and not spend money.

The other night we decided to get out met real live people. A certain establishment in Denver sponsors a free concert each week during the summer so we went there.
This establishment is also known for being the number one Cougar hang-out in the city. Let me tell you, this place was Cougar-ville. And Cougar-ville doesn't look anything like Courtney Cox!
My friend and I arrived at the patio - concert atmosphere and she noted that for once in the past year, she felt really young!

I looked around and all I saw was OLD.
I hate saying that because old does not equal BAD. Allow me to explain by sharing my thought process.

I looked around and saw all these older men. Some of them looked pretty good. Most of them did not. I wish it were not true but I am just not attracted to older men.

Though I will admit that in my 20s I found actor Craig T. Nelson extremely attractive - but let's face it... back then he was about the age I am now!
But more concerning to me, were the cougars themselves. Decked out in outfits meant for someone 20 years younger - obvious make-up plastered on their tight-post-plastic surgery faces... and still prowling for a man.

My mind flashed to myself in 7 to 10 more years. I pitied these women.
The same as I pity the paunchy 60-year-old divorced men out there still prowling for a mate.

I don't want to become that.

Sure - their single status may be the result of a divorce, or even an untimely death - but I find it so sad when these old coots are still out pursuing women... especially if they are cruising woman 20 years their junior.

Oh my, I sound so judgmental!!! And I don't want to be!

But most of all, I don't want to be a lonely old woman still searching for love after my crow's feet are deeper and my butt is even flatter.

Honestly, I can't afford the plastic surgery it would require to enhance my boobs and tweak my face... and I wouldn't want to invest in that anyway.

I'm 40 and I need to find my love now!

(what great relief to hear from McTwitchy the next day ... who is out of town and messaged that he misses me! Whew.)


Heidi said...

I know a man who is 34 for whom I am FAR too old (at 35) because he still chases 19-year-olds. It's creepy enough that even if he WERE to ask me out, I wouldn't go because I know his track record. For this reason, I won't even flirt with someone who isn't over 25. And, while I've changed my acceptable age range in the last few years, I won't take seriously anyone who isn't over 28. Conversely, there are way too many creepy old men out there. It's a frightening thing, facing this aging business. Best of luck to you--thank goodness McTwitchy is around!

erinannie said...

I had a job interview on Wednesday with a VERY young company. The oldest employee is 37. They deal with some very new technology, so it isn't surprising that everyone there is super young. I met with the guy that will report to me. He was trying to get a feel for how well I know "new" technology, considering I'm not in the target group for such things. But the way he said it was priceless. It basically came out, "You are smart for being so old, but do you think you can keep up?" I couldn't stop laughing. He realized as soon as he said it how poorly it came out. So he starts digging a hole trying to make it better. Next thing you know, he says, "I wouldn't have guessed you are so old. I mean, you look good for your age. I mean, you're hot, so I wouldn't think you are old."
Oh my goodness. Hilarious and flattering in the most insulting of ways.

TRS said...

Erin... OMG that's funny! Good thing you are such a good sport!

Lissen boy! Shut Up!

I am laughing SO hard!

Genevra said...

True that.

TRS said...

Let me tell you... I'm a bit concerned because when I pointed out to my friend that the Cougars were dressed 20 years younger than they should be - she asked - Aren't we guilty of the same crime?

Oh no. I figure we are dressed age appropriately...
Until I realized that because of my body size and shape - I still shop in the JR's Department and probably always will! It's unavoidable!! Nothing else fits me!
And if I'm blessed enough to maintain this figure - nothing else ever will. (unless I come into money... designer clothes fit like JR's )

Anonymous said...

I can get some of what you're saying (the 20 years younger stuff). But, the "old coots" out looking for women...if your wife dies, you sit around for the rest of your life alone? Or 'don't go out you're old and have a paunch'.
If you don't find love when you're pretty, stay home?
I love reading your blog, but yikes, that's harsh.

TRS said...

@ Anonymous ~ I know! I said I felt bad while I was writing it!

Obviously that's not what I mean - I just don't want them fishing in my pool - although I admit, my friend and I went to the Cougar pool and not the other way around.

But there are men out there - as evidenced in an article in Denver's 5280 magazine... the most eligible singles issue... in which was featured this 62 year old guy - obviously divorced who said in his interview that he likes dating women of all ages just for fun. Now that's an 'old coot' who is just out using women by flaunting his money and looking to get l@!d when he should be a decent old man and get married already. It's disgusting if you ask me.

Herding Grasshoppers said...

Oh my... I'm cracking up at Erinannie... too bad you don't have a video of that poor guy! Did you get the job?!

On the topic of the post -

Ya know... I think what was so creepy about the people you saw (at the Cougar thing) wasn't that they were older, but that they were behaving like college students. It's not creepy that an older single person wants to meet someone... wants a relationship. The ew factor comes from people (of any age, really) acting like cats in heat.

Just my $.02


Anonymous said...

I was just going to reply to TRS about the age thing when I read your reply.
If you the age in TRS' note from 62 to 28, is it still disgusting?
Yup. So it's not the age, it's the behavior.

I also have problems with the word 'Cougar'. It started describing the women TRS was watching. Older, tight face, lots of makeup, clothes and out for sex. Now it means any woman over 40 on a date. They called Demi Moore a cougar. She's married for crying out loud!