I've been listening for a few years now, and not only do their conversation topics seem recycled but they're always talking about people who cheat, have one-night-stands, and other acts that made me continually cynical about society as a whole. It's particularly depressing to think if there are any single men out there... they're certainly not going to be interested in church-going, abstinent, modest little me. Makes the prospect of finding a suitable husband - or someone I would even care to date in this market - well, next to impossible!
So one day I decided to find the KLove station, and I haven't moved the dial since.
Sure, maybe it's a bit like sticking my head in the sand - but my attitude has improved significantly. At first the "Positive, Encouraging" schtick seemed so Pollyanna - almost annoying. But now, I'm just happy.
My best friend and soulmate, Kikr, also listens to KLove in her city and we enjoy the fact that we are likely listening to the same songs at the same time! We've talked about our favorites... and usually when I call her, I'm in the car, and by the time her voicemail kicks in - I'm in the middle of a verse of a favorite song and she has to wait for me to sing along to the refrain before I leave her a message! Because she is my soulmate - she LOVES that and is not annoyed.
We talked this weekend and the topic of our current favorite songs came up. Maybe you've heard about The Story Project... different artists have recorded songs that tell stories from the bible. The story of Naomi and Ruth is the first release and it's quite beautiful.
I told Kikr that, in listening to that song... she is my Naomi. She married four years ago, and is still a daily force in my life! She is as invested in me finding a love in my life as I am. Sometimes more!
So I told her that the song reminds me of her - particularly the line that says,
"I'm with you,I wanted her to know how blessed I am that even though her life is full, she still has time for me. She blesses me every day.
Until your heart finds a home,
I won't let you feel alone
I'm with you, I'm with you"
She said, "Well, I've got news for you. When you get married, I'm not going anywhere!"
I was reduced to tears, and with a tinge of shame I admitted that I was worried that I might lose her when her baby comes this spring.
She emphasized that she hasn't forgotten about me since she got married - we both know she's the ONLY one in that category! Still, I worried that it was too good to be true that she'll have the same time, concern and intimacy with me once the baby arrives.
I am smart enough to realize that maybe we're not waiting until my heart finds a home... rather, perhaps her heart is my home.
It's certainly big enough and I am blessed!