Sunday, May 01, 2011

Was He Prince Charming or True Love?

(or can you have both?)

Prior to the event of the Royal Wedding, I couldn't help having cynical thoughts of just what this union was about.

I kept thinking of the marriage between Lady Diana Spencer and Prince Charles... and how even before her death... the whole thing ended terribly.   In retrospect it began terribly when the Monarchy wouldn't allow Charles to marry the woman he really loved, Camilla, because she didn't suit the Royal standard.   So poor 19 year old Diana was swept up in it, after meeting Charles only 13 times!

How did that happen? Do you agree to marry a prince just because you're asked?  Because it's good for your family for you to do so?

So in watching Prince William and Kate, it is rather believable to see that she could meet the prince who attends her college classes, get to know him and date him.
What I find difficult to believe is how do you really fall in love with such a ... spectacle? ... icon? ...  yeah... an icon of your society?
How do you say, "Yes, I will marry you, become a target of public scrutiny, become a leader of the people of England. I agree to become a spectacle for the public to either love or hate.  For tabloids to discuss my weight or the condition of my skin, or my raising of our future children ad nauseum." ???

I mean, I know women who wouldn't want to marry a police officer or a rodeo cowboy or a doctor because of the undesirable work hours, travel or the danger involved.   But to marry into a family thusly opening yourself up to scrutiny for the rest of your life and beyond?!?!?  Who would do that?  Could she really LOVE him?  And if she did, would that life be worth it?

What stood out to me during the ceremonies was Kate's incredible poise and sophistication.  It is as if she is meant for the monarchy. In contrast to Diana's nervousness and tittering on her wedding day. (as well as her bumbling throughout the engagement and first years of marriage.)  But then Kate's poise sent me to thoughts of... "This must be a contractual obligation... she's had designs on royalty for years... this is a power move for her!"

Am I this jaded?  I think I am.
Sometimes I am at the point that I think it can never really happen.  That there is no way that I will actually find the one guy (or ten) that respects my faith life, respects my family, respects his mother, would like to have children but will be okay with it if it turns out I can't do, thinks I'm pretty, thinks I'm funny, respects me wants to take day trips and weekend trips with me, and spend his life with me.... who I also respect, find attractive, can be loyal to, want to spend time with... etc etc.   Then, like a shift in the wind, I think there has to be!  Just has to be.  There is no way God intends for me to be alone forever. 

It's truly hard to imagine, loving someone so very much that neither of you are afraid of what could happen over the next 50 years.

I have a hard time imagining that someone as beautiful and elegant as Kate Middleton could actually have fallen in love with this Prince and he with her!
It simply can't happen!  I can't even fall in love with a decent guy with a good job or a good heart and have him love me back.  How impossible is it that this woman can really be love with a royal?  Come on.  It's the stuff of fairy tales!!

Then suddenly it was clear.

As the cameras followed the carriage ride of the Prince and Princess back to Windsor Castle   Buckingham Palace... anyone capable of simple lip-reading could make it out as Kate turned to Prince William and said, "I am so happy."

And I believe she is.  I believe he is too.
Do I believe I can ever find someone to love so much that I'd be willing to change my life in such a remarkable, uncomfortable way? And know that he indeed loves me?  I'm not so sure.  It wasn't supposed to be this hard to begin with!  
But anything is possible.  Fairy tale or not.

Photo pulled from


Genevra said...

Aww, I do think that anything is possible and I also think that something it is just a matter of timing. But it sure does get awfully tiresome being patient sometimes doesn't it?

Personally I think it is great they dated as long as they did. Can you imagine the sort of baggage that guy must have experiencing his parents marriage and always being in the spotlight? Marriage is can be a challenge enough without adding that into the mix. Not to mention if I compare myself to 19 to who I was at 29, it is night and day. So I think Kate certainly has a leg up on Diana in that regard. She has had YEARS of practice with living in the spotlight, and now she is doing it on a much larger scale, so she willingly choose it and knew what she was getting into. With Diana it seemed she was just thrust into it, I wondered if she had been 29 and little wiser, if she would have made the same choice as she did at 19. Somehow I don't think that she would.

Who knows, but Kate certainly looked gorgeous.

I will say it always makes me giggle a little when someone says they like the Royals because every little girl wants to be a princess and marry a prince. That may be, but there is also a happily ever after added, and there seem to be very few royal marriages that have that.

Liz said...

I think there's been a lot of cynicism - myself included. Even last week in the run up to the wedding the more republican (in our meaning!) newspapers carried satirical articles about Kate manoeuvring her way into the royal family. [This series of 'letters' is one of my favourites: ]

But perhaps the very fact that people felt able to be cynical indicates that they believe that they are in love. I'd like to think that they are, and I also hope Harry doesn't get pressured into a wedding just because this one's been such a success!

PS - It was Buckingham Palace, not Windsor Castle. ;)

TRS said...

Ooh.... thanks for the correction Liz. How sloppy of me!